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An Encounter With Their Maker Author: Pesmerga
(Added on Apr 13, 2005) (This month 55098 readers) (Total 79273 readers)
In the distant future, humanity is at war with the race that created it. Three captured girls are left to the mercy of a doctor who sees them as nothing more than his playthings.

Ratings and Reviews:
Number of Ratings: 4
3 Votes
3 Votes
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1 Vote 3 Votes
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Weighed Average (?): (6/10)
Average Rating: (6/10)
Highest Rating: (6/10)
Lowest Rating: (5/10)

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Reviewer: Avralivia (Edit) Rating: Jul 12, 2006
iliked the ideas with work it would be excellent :) (6/10)

Reviewer: Dododecapod (Edit) Rating: Apr 19, 2005
Nice idea, but your witing could use work. For one thing, too much exposition; try having info coming from the mouths of your characters, rather than just telling us. Describe the sexual encounters, don't just tell us about them (the lesbian scene with the third girl wasn't bad, but could use work). Try using multiple senses in each scene.
You do speech reasonably well, but try sounding it out after you've written it; if it sounds stilted, it probably is.
Still, fun and interesting. Definitely promising. (6/10)

Reviewer: La Toya (Edit) Rating: Apr 15, 2005
While I am not a sci-fi fan, this was not too bad. Ithink it would have been better as a longer more detailed story (6/10)

Reviewer: chksng19 (Edit) Rating: Apr 14, 2005
This could be a real powerful story with a few additions (moving to a larger scale: 3 girls?) and some editing. (5/10)

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