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Plantation Slave
Author: David l
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(Added on Mar 16, 2006)
(This month 138065 readers) (Total 169329 readers) |
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A beautiful white woman slave tries to escape from her owner and is captured, punished and sold to other plantation owners for field work. |
| Ratings and Reviews: |
| Number
of Ratings: 10 |
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Weighed
Average (?):  (6/10) |
| Average
Rating: (6/10) |
Highest
Rating:  (9/10) |
Lowest
Rating:  (4/10) |
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| Reviewer:
Venom
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Mar 21, 2008 |
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First of all: I like your style, and I like your ideas. But the descriptions in this story are indeed much too roughly. Nevertheless, this narration isn't bad in itself, and I would be happy about an extended version.
One detail:
you mentioned a "vicious bullwhipping" with hundred lashes. After such a treatment X53211 would be dead or at least having her back torn to shreds right to the bones - most probably both. Diverse sources say that for a really REAL whipping the lethal limit lies around fourty lashes, for a slender woman obviously lower. But of course you can give your slavegirl as many - well deserved - licks of the whip as you want to. :) (7/10)
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| Reviewer:
agp_millie
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Mar 19, 2006 |
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Good basic story line, altho' a little too much whipping of slave, but needed more detail in her forced sexual coitus with guards and animals.
But then, that's just me and i'm not fond of Dommes, prefer Dom. Men. lol
xxx (5/10)
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| Reviewer:
texswim
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Mar 18, 2006 |
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I really like the story. The amount and types of punishments are amazing and creative. A little bit more detail during the punishments would be usefull (9/10)
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- Replied by:
maitre
(Edit) (Mar 18, 2006)
- Thank you for the excellent rating. The first part of this text was developed by the artist ARIES for BDSMARTWOK. I believe he titled it SLAVE PLANTATION . He brought to life what I was trying to decribe. He did an excellent job but then I lost track of him when he discontinued working with BDSMARTWORK. He only addressed the first few episodes.
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| Reviewer:
La Toya
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Mar 17, 2006 |
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I like the idea of the story. Everyone else as covered the problems. (4/10)
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| Reviewer:
chksng19
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Mar 17, 2006 |
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After all that treatment and she was still "The naked blonde beauty"? That descriptive phrase (which was repeated over and over) likely was no longer true after the first time with the dogs.
Characters need motivation for what they do. Victim needs feelings demonstrated and spoken more often. (4/10)
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| Reviewer:
carrie
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Mar 16, 2006 |
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The story has good potential but as others have said it needs to be more descriptive. The chapters read as if they were previews to the story rather than the actual story itself. (4/10)
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| Reviewer:
heycarrieanne
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Mar 16, 2006 |
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What exactly is this story to supposed to be about? You give no background or any understanding about the characters. You talk about a lot whippings and beastiality, but give no real descriptions. I think your idea is good, but you need more descriptions and details, please. (4/10)
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| Reviewer:
Klauw
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Mar 16, 2006 |
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The bestiality aspect could be more explicit...
And please, use bigger letters... (9/10)
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| Reviewer:
sylvia_ber
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Mar 16, 2006 |
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The story is more like an overview of an story that might be written. It have real potential, but it have to be rewritten carefully. (4/10)
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| Reviewer:
mkemse
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Mar 16, 2006 |
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i am not into animals at all, so the little bit about her and the horse was not an issue for me, what bothered me most aboutthe storyi s the chapters were way to short wish you had made longer chapters i enjoyed the description of her daily pain and torment hope you add more soon (9/10)
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