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A trip to hell
Author: Dhemius
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(Added on Apr 15, 2012)
(This month 85030 readers) (Total 140052 readers) |
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A bus with schoolgirls going for a trip is captured by thugs and criminals. What follows is a vicious orgy or rape, abuse and torture. |
| Ratings and Reviews: |
| Number
of Ratings: 6 |
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Weighed
Average (?):  (8/10) |
Average
Rating:  (8.5/10) |
Highest
Rating:  (10/10) |
Lowest
Rating:  (7/10) |
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| Reviewer:
willowspirit
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Sep 7, 2012 |
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Very intense stuff! Sometimes hard to follow who is saying what. Great technique of going back and forth in time in order to reveal the characters. The timing of this technique was pretty much right on. Writer is very skilled in this. Needs MORE chapters!!! (8/10)
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| Reviewer:
missybeauty1985
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Aug 27, 2012 |
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Now this is the kind of story that I like. Teen schoolgirls, rape, bondage, orgy!!! (9/10)
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| Reviewer:
bcathie
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Aug 16, 2012 |
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In my opinion this is an excellent story! I actuelly liked the way the first chapter turns between the victims as the readers get a nice introduction to them and to the whole scenario. It was kind of exciting to read about their peronalities and talkings in the bus when I already knew what later would happen to them... Plz keep working on this nice story:) (10/10)
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| Reviewer:
Tavy
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Jun 1, 2012 |
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Although there were some confusing typo errors in the middle I'll give it 8 as I enjoyed it so much, unlike other reviewers I quite liked the way it was set out, though there is one short paragraph which I can't work out the context of ! (8/10)
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| Reviewer:
bassman007
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Apr 18, 2012 |
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Good story idea. Would be better if you made a break between the back-story and current scenes instead of just between characters. Would love to see more detail in what's going on too. (7/10)
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| Reviewer:
d1ll1gaf
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Apr 18, 2012 |
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This story has tremendous promise, how can a bus full of girls not?
The only problem I have with the story is the rapid jumping between scenes. With the structure of BDSM Library it would be more conductive to have each girl being given a chapter to herself. Then she can be raped, tortured and raped again is glorious detail and the author won't have to post the entire story at once thereby keeping the reader wanting more. (7/10)
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- Replied by:
dhemius
(Edit) (May 7, 2012)
- I agree completely - we have chosen our structure of the story before we agreed that it isn't working as it was intended to. Switching between them was supposed to show the chaos and the orgy - then the next chapters will be girl-oriented as they are brutalized one by one.
Thank you for the comment :)
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